kangeiko

I have successfully survived the 1 year anniversary. It was as stressful as you would expect, but it was good that we made the trip and did everything we were supposed to. It was also incredibly tiring, and I came back ready for a holiday (and greeted by a lot of people asking "how was your break?" which never ceases to be the worst question. I answered with "it was a family commitment" which seemed enough for people to drop it).

I also managed to get both my space_swap and my smutswap assignments in on time, hallelujah. In fact, the space_swap collection is already open and there are some great works in there! My delicious gift is linked below - it was just what I needed to brighten my day! Lovely, spot-on characterisation of Lister and Rimmer, and a sweet friends to lovers transition (with some self-sacrifice as my bullet-proof kink), it was everything I ever wanted in this ship. <3 Thank you, mystery author!

Decompilation (4958 words) by Anonymous
Fandom: Red Dwarf
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Dave Lister/Arnold Rimmer
Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Repressed, Friends to Lovers, Self-Sacrifice, Not Without Serious Qualms Though, This Is Rimmer After All
Summary: He had to smile. That ruined everything.

I also wanted to rec a couple of works which you should also check out:

VID: Come With Me Now (0 words) by Anonymous
Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Heimdall/Thor
Summary: "Heimdall, I know you can see me." A Thor/Heimdall fanvid.

( Embedded video behind the cut ) And -

Access Records (1008 words) by Anonymous
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Seven of Nine & Naomi Wildman, Kathryn Janeway & Naomi Wildman, B'Elanna Torres & Naomi Wildman
Characters: Naomi Wildman, Seven of Nine, Kathryn Janeway, B'Elanna Torres
Additional Tags: Holodecks/Holosuites, Worldbuilding, Friendship, Female Friendship, Mentors
Summary: Holodeck Access Records (Weekly History) - Wildman, Naomi

Both of which are fantastic!


Also, not part of the swap but still a rec I wanted to share, is this wonderful vid for the Ladies of Marvel:



In other fandom news, I signed up for the wipbigbang  with my endless MCU Stony WIP. What does this mean? Well, the good news is, it'll be finished by the deadline, which is great. The bad news is that I can't post anything until the deadline has passed, so there will be a bit of a moratorium on updates until the end of July. However, it should hopefully be accompanied by some lovely fan art, so definitely looking forward to that. Given my sporadic updates over the last few months, I doubt anyone will notice, honestly. (I was aiming to finish it by Endgame, laughsobno. We're going to see Endgame on Sat 27th so I will be buried under a rock Thurs-Sat to avoid spoilers, and will likely then come home and sob and write.)

Finally, I had a bit of an AO3 kudos milestone hit during the last couple of weeks, and it made me realize just how long I've been on AO3. It'll be 10 years this winter. I should do something for that, but I'm at a bit of a loss. Any suggestions?

Day 2

Rec at least three fanworks that you didn't create. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

Rojer (36770 words) by x_los
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Blake's 7
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Kerr Avon/Roj Blake, OC/OC
Characters: Kerr Avon, Roj Blake, Vila Restal, Dayna Mellanby, Del Tarrant, Jenna Stannis, Soolin (Blake's 7), Deva (Blake's 7), Carnell (Blake's 7), Orac (Blake's 7), Zen (Blake's 7), OCs, Inga
Additional Tags: Kid Fic
Summary: Taking down the Federation might actually be easier than sorting out what's going on with Rojer's parents.

Why I love it: This fic made me ridiculously happy! With clones being a thing in the B7 universe, it's not even a crack premise, and it's beautifully written.

*

helvegen (1029 words) by homovikings
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Relationships: Loki/Thor (Marvel), Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson
Characters: Thor, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Peter Parker, Loki, Thanos, Wanda Maximoff, Carol Danvers, James "Bucky" Barnes, Sam Wilson (Marvel)
Additional Tags: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, possible canon divergence
Summary: Okay, he thinks. Okay.

Why I love it: Prepare to have your heart broken. I've read a lot of post-IW fics but I keep coming back to this one, because it captures Thor's pain and numbness so incredibly well.

*

just in it for the game (6202 words) by grim_lupine
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Loki/Thor (Marvel)
Characters: Loki (Marvel), Thor (Marvel), Ensemble
Additional Tags: Post-Ragnarok, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Time, Humor, Author's Favorite
Summary: “It's excellent rehabilitation for my image,” Loki says, widening his eyes. “They love you, and because of that they'll trust me. You wouldn't ruin this for me, would you?”

Thor glares at him.

Loki’s mouth twitches. “Also, it's the funniest thing that's ever happened to me.”

Why I love it: because I can't read it without laughing, and it's also incredibly true to the characters' voices.

I've got this week off so I'm making a bit of an effort to catch up on a few fandom bits and pieces. First off, given what has been happening to the LJ servers, I'll no longer be cross-posting there. I'll also be taking down more sensitive posts, including photos etc. I won't delete my LJ because I use it to read communities, but if you follow me on both, please be aware that I'll only be (sporadically) updating my DW.

Secondly, although I was signed up for Yuletide this year, I sadly had to default fairly early on due to health issues. However, I received some amazing gifts just to same. These are so wonderfully in character, and I am absolutely thrilled with them. Please do give them some love!

Something Smells Fishy, Tyler (1894 words) by Small_Hobbit
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Life on Mars (UK)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Gene Hunt, Sam Tyler
Summary: When Gene Hunt has suspicions there may be more to a case than initially meets the eye, neither he nor Sam Tyler realise quite how much is involved.

Needs Must (1296 words) by lah_mrh
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Red Dwarf
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Arnold Rimmer, Dave Lister, Kryten (Red Dwarf), The Cat (Red Dwarf)
Additional Tags: Season/Series 06, Injury, Friendship
Summary: Sometimes it takes an emergency to show what you're truly capable of.

I also received a fantastic Top Gear fic for the TGS Secret Santa, but as it's in a locked comm I won't link to it directly unless/until it's posted publicly. Suffice to say, it's fantastic and I am a very happy reader!

*

And I suppose I should do a year in fic retrospective?

First up is the Secret Santa fic I *did* manage to complete, for the TGS Secret Santa.

The Honorable Schoolboy (5215 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Top Gear (UK) RPF
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Jeremy Clarkson/James May
Characters: Jeremy Clarkson, James May, Richard Hammond, Andy Wilman
Additional Tags: Community: topgearslash, Secret Santa, Episode: Top Gear Middle East Special, Episode: Top Gear Africa Special, Episode: Top Gear Ukraine
Summary: Jeremy's suspicions get out of hand.

Earlier in the year I participated in the history exchange:

i have cut a ribbon of skin from another man's body (4333 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Ancient History RPF, Greek and Roman Mythology
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Olympias/Zeus, Olympias/Philip II of Macedon
Characters: Olympias, Zeus, Philip II of Macedon
Summary: She meets the god four times in her life, in four different guises.

And I also wrote a couple of snippets of F1 fics - one write-up of an (older) tumblr headcanon, and a new chapter in a WIP:

the coward does it with a kiss (1919 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
>Fandom: Formula 1 RPF
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Relationships: Alain Prost/Ayrton Senna, Nelson Piquet/Alain Prost
Characters: Alain Prost, Nelson Piquet, Nelson Piquet Jr, Nicolas Prost, Niki Lauda
Additional Tags: Headcanon
Summary: Nelson has many character flaws. This isn't even a complete list.

The Fire Sermon on Mount Cyllene (8979 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 3/?
Fandom: Formula 1 RPF
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Alain Prost/Ayrton Senna, Alain Prost/Anne Marie Prost, Nelson Piquet/Alain Prost
Characters: Alain Prost, Ayrton Senna, Nelson Piquet, Nigel Mansell, Anne Marie Prost, Niki Lauda, Cesare Fiorio
Additional Tags: suddenly a girl, Fem!Alain, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Gender Issues
Summary: The race over, the trophies presented and the champagne spilled, the crowd thought the lights above the circuit were part of the show.
"What’s that?" Gerhard asked, pointing.
Alain squinted up into the bright flicker, the ground beneath him feeling uncertain, as if he was a little boy drunk on a thimbleful of sherry. "A comet," he said, sounding a bit doubtful, and then everything went dark.

*

I also watched the new Sherlock, which was... well, it had some plot issues. The first few that occurred to me, in no particular order: ( Read more... )

Sorry for bringing logic to a nonsense party. I had to phone my mother and rant at her down the phone while she laughed helplessly at my rage.

Do better, show. Do better.

 I hope everyone is having a fantastic holiday season. This year, I participated in several fic exchanges which means I got awesome gifts to open before/during Christmas day and if you haven't read them yet, you totally should.

For yuletide , I got the absolutely amazing you and i are a collection of unfortunate events, which is a Rush fic and so wonderful it took my breath away. It gives the James perspective on the Niki crash, and it does it with such delicacy of touch and neatness of phrase that it left me grinning like a loon. James's inability to work out what exactly his feelings are - other than he has plenty of them - also rung true for me, as did Marlene finally sighing and kicking Niki into sorting it. This fic is wonderful and you should all check it out!

For f1secretsanta I got The burden of things unsaid, which is a wonderful Sebastian/Mark fic. Seb/Mark is my guilty pleasure and this fic so wonderfully captures the contrariness of Seb's feelings for Mark. The Valencia crash made me think, but how could Seb NOT run to check he's ok?? And that is exactly what he does - however you feel about someone, when you see something like that, you check they're ok. And Sebastian in this fic is so mixed up and confused about his own feelings for Mark that he can't do much to stop them bubbling to the surface. 

For topgearslash secret santa I got Night Manoeuvres, which is James/Jeremy h/c and nailed all my kinks. James having nightmares? Check. Jeremy awkwardly caring & trying to help? Check. Awkward first kisses? Check. NNnngggggg bulletproof kinks, I am not kidding. This is so perfectly in character and so deftly done I defy anyone to not fall in love with it. 

Secret authors, one and all - thank you! You have made my Christmas reading a joyous affair indeed! <333

(For anyone wondering where I've got to, btw, I'm now mostly active on tumblr under the same user name, and squeeing over Top Gear and F1 for the most part, so come say hello there!)

So, after much flanick, I was able to write a few treats for yuletide . The reveal -

up, up the long delirious burning blue for destina 
Fandom: Top Gun
Characters: Maverick/Iceman
Warnings: Major Character Death
Summary: Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth / And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings ... Maverick is re-assigned to Bosnia. He's not prepared for it, not in the least.

Salome Dances for selenak 
Fandom: The Borgias
Characters: Lucrezia Borgia/Giulia Farnese, Cesare Borgia, Vannozza dei Cattanei
Warnings: obligatory Borgia incest warning
Summary: Lucrezia is quite taken by the lovely Giulia Farnese

The Winter Queen for sloppycronkite 
Fandom: Game of Thrones (TV)
Characters: Daenerys Targaryen/Viserys Targaryen
Warnings: obligatory Targaryen incest warning
Summary: Daenerys knows it's just a matter of being patient. Things will be better once Viserys is king.

*

I am also able to thank my lovely Yuletide authors! I was doubly-blessed this year with not one, but two wonderful fics. Both of them are sweet and happy, and made me squeak with joy on Christmas Day. Thank you so much to bethbethbeth  and Serenade , you guys are awesome!

"Unless I'm very much mistaken..." by bethbethbeth 
Formula 1 RPF, Senna/Prost.
This is my main fic, and absolutely wonderful. It's the Senna/Prost relationship through the eyes of a young fan, who goes to the Brands Hatch GP in the hope of winning Ayrton's affections for herself. I love this story to bits, it's absolutely brilliant. From the setting - it's Brands, you guys, I practically live there half the year these days! - to the flashes of the motorsport world, to the Senna/Prost relationship itself, this is hilarious and heart-warming.

Homecoming by Serenade 
Seafort Saga - David Feintuch, Seafort/Tolliver
This is my lovely treat from Serenade (I totally knew it was you, lol!), who has managed the impossible: funny, happy fic in the Seafort Saga universe. I know, right?! I love it. Tolliver is fed up of Nick's unreasonable demands re: the redecoration of his office, so drags him to Ikea. This is cracky and hilarious.

*

A couple of yuletide recs. I haven't really had a chance to do much reading, but what I have read I have enjoyed a lot.

Please, please please by AdaptationDecay 
John Lewis adverts
This is lovely! I love the adverts anyway, I think they're brilliant, and this fic manages to capture the spirit of them, and is also wickedly clever. It put a real smile on my face. Plus bonus sekkrit crossover!

Turn a New Page, Tear the Old One Out by shrift 
Breakfast Club, Bender/Brian
Bender gets a new life, and how. Lovely and well-realised future fic.

Safely back from Burundi. The placed was beautiful, but the conference was very stressful. I had hoped to have some time to write, and I did, a bit, but it really wasn't the most conducive environment for creativity, so I got neither of my help_japan fics done, for which I apologise. I'd hoped to get them done by the end of June, but that's looking less likely by the second. I got back on Friday morning (by virtue of saying "sod it" and getting a flight a few nights earlier), and on Tuesday I leave again, this time for full immersion security simulations, complete with men in balaklavas and toting AK47s. Then I get back, repack, and set off for the Isle of Wight, to see an old friend I haven't seen for months. Then I get back, repack, and set off for women traveller-specific security training, i.e. The Rape Simulation Exercise. That one promises to be a barrel of laughs for all concerned. Then I get back, have a couple of days at work doing admin-y things, repack, and set off for the Superprix at Brands. Then I get back, have a week at work, and 84 celebrations are in that weekend. Then I have another week at work, and then pack and set off for the MSVR weekender at Brands Hatch. Then I get back, etc etc.

Basically, I will be lucky to have time to breathe, let alone write, for the next few weeks. GAH. My existential writer-angst is made all the more poignant by the fact that both of the people I bid on for help_japan have already finished their fics for me, and OMG they are EXCELLENT. I mean seriously, overwhelmingly good. Stuck as I was with minimal internet connectivity, they even emailed me copies I could download and read offline, which made me a very happy camper indeed.

So, without further ado, I urge you to go and read the following excellent fic. Both are Top Gear RPF, J/J, and both are NC-17, so use your own judgement if RPF troubles you.

Wise Man by marginaliana [locked to AO3 registered users only] is set during the Middle East episode because, well, I was a little bewildered that no one was writing about it when it could be the source of so much angst. So I asked for it specifically, and marginaliana obliged with a sweet, angsty, hot fic from Jeremy's POV, centred around James's accident.

and

Well After All byblacktofade , which is also set during the Middle East episode, this time from James' POV. blacktofade asked if I had any particular wishes or kinks, and I immediately said, "awkwardness and uncertainty during first-time sex, please!" And Well After All delivers. Boy, does it deliver. Hot and funny and awkward and brilliant.

Both of these fics are absolutely amazing, and I swear I didn't arrange it to have one from James's POV and one from Jeremy's, but it made me insanely happy. You wanted Middle East fics? THESE ARE THE DEFINITIVE ONES.

Quite a few people have been raving over George Kirk (helloooo friends?skip=10million!), so I thought a small recs post in order. These are all TOS; has any George Kirk reboot fic been written yet?

TOS
- Final Frontier by Diane Carey: George Kirk joins Captain April on the maiden voyage of the Enterprise. I like this pro-novel a lot, it has fun bits, adventure bits, some great cameos, and really fleshed out George Kirk for me.
- Best Destiny by Diane Carey: another pro-novel with prominent George Kirk. Young Jimmy Kirk wants nothing to do with Starfleet, and resents being dragged out in the middle of nowhere by his 'fleeter dad.
- Kirk Ordered Another Beer by Syl: First-line challenge answer. James T Kirk isn't the only Kirk in ST canon.

And, also, a 'what if' in honour of the reboot:

What If? by Syl: The Klingons decide to go back in time and kill Kirk's parents when he is a child.

The new President is busy overturning close to a decade of insane and borderline-psychotic policies:
- A lift on the ban on stem cell research.
- Dropping the global gag rule.
- Banning 'enhanced interrogation' and rendition - or as we like to call it, torture and kidnapping.
- Pledging to close Guantanamo Bay, and all ghost prisons.

Other stuff has also happened that shock me beyond words:

The good:
- Laurent Nkunda is captured in Rwanda. If you don't know who General Nkunda is, he's a born-again Christian who happens to be the leader of the rebel armies doing their fair of raping, killing and mutilating across the Democratic Republic of the Congo. The DRC has requested that Nkunda be extradited. The worry now is that a deal may be struck or, worse, that he may be executed. Neither one of these options fills me with joy. But not having him running about with the killing and the mutilating and the raping? Plus, there is a small but still present chance that he might be put on trial. Which - would be a blessed miracle indeed.

The bad:
- New evidence of Gaza child deaths - what's shocking about this is not that children died (because when you wage a war in the middle of a city you're going to primarily kill civilians, let's not kid ourselves), but that Israel is still insisting that people were shooting at them. Looking at several of their targets - UN facilities, schools, groups of children - that's starting to wear a little thin. I'd like a real answer - and an investigation - of this.
- UN accuses Israel of using white phosphorous. For those who don't know what phosphorus does, imagine something that clings to you, that can't be removed, and that will stick until it burns right through you, through skin and muscle and bone. Now throw that stuff at a bunch of civilians, and watch even the smallest wound kill. The reports that this might have been used against civilians horrifying. I'm going to be following the investigation of this very closely indeed.
- Artic melt 20 years ahead of climate models - US researchers claim to have found evidence that accelerated melting has crossed a "tipping point" from which there is no going back.

***

Something not related to the Real World - and we can all be grateful -

Nextwave slash, by apiphile. I leave you with the image of the Captain helping Aaron try out his latest attachment. And I run away in the opposite direction.

I didn't do much reading today, as I mostly slept and puttered about. But that means that I can get my recs caught up with my reading. (Otherwise at the end of the reading there will be fifty squillion recs to write and - no. I'm just not that disciplined.)

Anyway, Recs Post the Third, Grandson of Recs:

Dr Seuss - One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish

- Out of the Dark
Let me say it now - I have zero familiarity with Dr Seuss. It was not a big feature of Communism when I was growing up. BUT. I love rhyming little pieces, especially when they are sinister, and this brought the creepy and unsettling by the spadeful.

*

RPF - X-Files

- The Schizophrenic Critique of Pure Reason in Beckett's Early Novels
I am not a real fan of RPF, I confess. When I read it, I tend to do so guiltily, as if someone will find out and punish me for it. BUT. David Duchovny/Gillian Anderson: I had to try it. And here David finds out that Gillian is not Scully, and while she may be beautiful, she is not smart. And David likes smart. And - oh, yes, exactly. It's perfect, and a little sad.

Aside: For a brief moment (about three seconds of my life I'm never getting back) I loved Gil Grissom (from CSI) with a fiery, fiery passion. This lasted until I saw an interview with the actor who plays him, and it immediately became apparent that he is a complete airhead. I was utterly crushed, and developed a deep sense of foreboding that the people I had crushes on were merely acting smart, as opposed to being smart themselves (my major worry was for Anthony Stewart Head, and the cast of The West Wing). Luckily, they turned out to be able to carry on a conversation (or at least an interview), so disaster was averted. BUT. I completely understand David's disappointment in the non-existence of Scully. Yes.

(That explanation was a lot longer than it was meant to be. Possibly as long as the fic. Never mind.)

*

ROME

- The Aeneid
Pitch-perfect continuation from the end of the show, with Veronus - who is dead, no really, guv'nor - setting up house with Pullo to run the collegia and raise their multitude of kids. Including Aeneas, formerly Caeserion.

*

Deadwood

- The Enemy of my Enemy
Al makes his morning rounds, sometimes during S1. This is perfectly in character, and made entirely out of squee.

*

Blackadder

- The Birthday Party
Speaking of squee, Queenie has her twelfth birthday party, and Edmund has to go. Drat. BUT. There is cake! And Nursie! And hide and seek! And Lizzie/Edmund! It's like the lost kid!episode, and made me giggle madly.

Some of the fics I've read and loved thus far, in no particular order. I've yet to work my way through the entire archive, so there will be loads more to follow later.

First up, it's the fic that I received from my mystery author - who is, quite simply, a genius -

Transmetropolitan
- The Worst Thing That Has Ever Happened To Spider Jerusalem
Let me say this now: I nearly peed myself laughing. And I am a little ashamed, because I love Spider a great deal, and I should have been feeling pity at the horrendous day he had, but instead, I had to join Channon and Yelena in falling off my chair laughing. This is perfectly in character, and features the Filthy Assistants in fine form. There are also appearances from The Beast, Royce, and one other unexpected guest, much to Spider's chagrin. Mystery author - I salute you!

*

3:10 to Yuma

- Some Call it a Mercy
After the end of the movie, Ben Wade tries to get on with his life. I really liked the total lack of 'fix-it' here - Dan doesn't miraculously survive, and there's no happily ever after. Except that there is, sorta. William turns out right, in any case, which makes me happy.

- Mutual Solace
Wade/Evans slash, post-movie. Having said I don't like fix-its, I also... like fix-its. What can I say; I contain multitudes. I particularly like the gradual nature of this, and how the focus is the familiarity and growing friendship between the two men, as opposed to them falling into bed filled with lust.

- You Weren't Born a Killer (But You Can't Tell That No More)
Charlie Prince, in all his ruthless glory. One for all the Charlie fans out there who despair at seeing him written as a shiny lovely pretty boy. This Charlie is a complete bastard - a murderer and rapist many times over - who is still the Charlie we recognise from the movie.

*

The American President

- Two Women
A series of parallels between Mary, the President's first wife, and Sydney Wade. I liked how rounded Mary Shepherd came across in this.

*

Askewniverse

- Cell Mates
Clerks 2, how do I love thee, let me count the ways! This picks up after the end of the movie, and delivers on Jay/Silent Bob. Actually, the strongest thing about it isn't the slash - which always feels a bit odd to actually be realised, in the case of J&SB - but Randal's self-sabotage and quasi-homophobic rant. It's spot on, and includes some hysterical interjections from the donkey fucker.

*

Boston Legal

- Backwards and Wearing High Heels
This has cross-dressing Alan, oblivious Denny, and a Brad who is so shocked he may be having a coronary. Bonus feature: Shirley's clothing, and Alan using impeccable legal reasoning. Absolutely hilarious.


*

Deadwood

- The Law of the Wise
A wonderfully long, gloriously rounded look at Alice Isringhausen and what she did after departing Deadwood. Beautiful writing and sharp characterisations make this one a must read; bonus points for an awesome appearance by Silas, who is made of win (and always knows when to yield gracefully).

*

Ursula Le Guin - the Hainish Cycle

- Other Kinds of Men
The story of Therem and his brother, and how things went well, and how they went badly. This is beautifully written, like a lost chapter of the book.

- The Shadows Cast Behind You
Estraven in the kemmerhouse. Again, it's the beautiful language that makes this vignette a must read.

- Cinders and Snow
For all those who were left wanting something more during the long trek back. This delivers on the familiarity and alienness of someone in kemmer, and the low pulse of attraction/repulsion that would have been ever-present as they waited out the cold.