kangeiko

I made this big deal out of sorting out my previous year's registration docs for WorldCon so I could nominate for this year's Hugo Awards, and... I'm a bit lost. This will be the first year I'm nominating, and it's quickly dawning on me that my reading is hopelessly behind and I haven't actually read enough to be able to nominate anything. Maybe for Hugos three or four years in the past, sure. (They should build a time-delay just for me.) I know the easy solution for this is to read recently-released things, but I'd managed to put things in some sort of reading order in a vague attempt to whittle down my TBR pile, and... ok, look, I admit it, I was too ambitious.

I'm still considering going to WorldCon, with a sort of vague longing. I don't think I could manage to go on my own (general stress and anxiety will pretty much put a stop to that), but I don't know anyone else making the journey, so... idk.

I wanted to share a few vids I'm really fond of that were recently uploaded on AO3 (and therefore easily bookmarkable). They're both by laurashapiro  and I've loved them for a long time.

First up -

Transparent (2 words) by Laura Shapiro
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Tara Maclay/Willow Rosenberg, Xander Harris/Willow Rosenberg, Daniel "Oz" Osbourne/Willow Rosenberg
Characters: Willow Rosenberg
Additional Tags: Angst, Animal Death, Animal Harm, vid, Video, Embedded Video, Fanvids
Summary: A Willow character study (through early Season 6)

Why I love it: Willow is one of my favourite Buffy characters. I know I say this about (almost) all the Buffy characters, but early anxious stressed Willow was someone I desperately wanted life to be kind to. She was genuinely quirky and funny, and Alyson Hannigan was SO good at making me empathise with her that I can't watch her cry without crying myself. Watching Willow hurt hurts me as well. This vid is basically an entire song's worth of Willow's anxiety and stress and hurt, so... it hurts, but in an incredibly good way.

Beatitudes (2 words) by Laura Shapiro
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Buffy Summers, Willow Rosenberg, Xander Harris, Rupert Giles, Anya Jenkins, Cordelia Chase, Angel (BtVS), Spike (BtVS), Riley Finn
Additional Tags: Ensemble Cast, Video, vid, Embedded Video, Fanvids, Vividcon
Summary: A requiem

Why I love it: Having said that Willow is my favourite... everyone else is also my favourite. Beatitudes had such a profound effect on me. I love the careful layering of the characters, the build of the crescendo, the triumph promised and won. (And there is a bit where the song goes "they can see god" and it's paired with this breathless revelation and that image and bit of song stuck with me from pretty much the first time I saw it, years ago.)

Actually, while I'm recc'ing Laura Shapiro's vids, let me add one more:

Circles (2 words) by Laura Shapiro
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The West Wing
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Abbey Bartlet, Jed Bartlet, Leo McGarry, Toby Ziegler
Additional Tags: Episode: s02e18 17 People, Vividcon, vid, Fanvids, Video, Embedded Video
Summary: The White House is no place for secrets.

Why I love it: LOOK AT IT. The pacing is perfect, the way the beats of the music exactly match the dramatic beats. This is one of my favourite parts of TWW canon, and the reveal is gorgeously done.

Also, I am very excited about the Open Doors imports that took place in 2018. If you haven't seen the list of imported archives yet, it includes such behemoths as the MTAC archive (the giant archive of NCIS fic) and the Spooky Awards (covering X-Files fic). I have spent SO many hours at both sites and I am really happy that they are now available at AO3 and the fics have been preserved. (I've had more than one moment of panic when attempted to access MTAC and finding the links broken or the site unavailable, so I'll be going through and carefully re-bookmarking everything.) There are a lot of fandoms covered - including The Sentinel, Firefly, Buffy, RPF, etc - and multi-fandom archives, so do have a look and update your bookmarks of your favourite works.

I'm also considering doing Smut Swap, and putting my nominations together was... interesting. Because I had the pairings, and then I had the kinks, and then... they wouldn't match. I could perfectly well imagine those kinks with other fandoms, but the fandoms I actually wanted to request? Nope. Anyway, I've put through what I've put through, but the kink noms are still really open for me because I only put a couple on there and I need to have a serious think about what I actually want to REQUEST, not look at the two lists separately.

And then I thought, "oh, and what I'm comfortable writing" and I blushed so hard I could feel it. I mean, I've written smut before. (Let's face it, I've written some absolutely filth, I'm OK with that.) But somehow this is turning me into a Victorian maiden. Idk what that's about. I will have to think hard about what to do re: this exchange. I do want to participate, but I suspect if I'm literally blushing over writing some mild kink, that's probably... not good. (I reiterate - I have written absolute filth in my time, I have no idea where this faux!shyness is coming from.)

I recently blitz re-watched Studio 60 and wow, do I have some conflicting feelings about it. On balance, I like it enough to re-watch it and to keep the DVD box-set. This can be contrasted with me failing to finish The Newsroom and having zero interest in giving it another go. (But then also with my love for The West Wing.) Sorkin is definitely a problematic fave, I'll admit, and a lot of his flaws are front and centre in Studio 60. Female characters inexplicably young for their role and clumsy as new-born colts? Check. Obsession with the Christian right to the exclusion of all else? Check. Male characters simultaneously smug and in power, check. But where we have genuine power-players in The West Wing, the power in Studio 60 is weirdly transitory. Everyone is revolving through the door of being hired and fired, on the air and potentially canned. Somehow, Jordan McDeere's personal history is front page news (is this a thing in the US, bc it's weird in the UK) and the romance with Danny is played for, well, romance, rather than stalking. Just... that whole thing didn't work for me, Jordan, Danny, any of it. I'd be OK while they were on the screen, and then the moment the camera wasn't on then I'd be revolted. I think it was a case of Bradley Whitford and Amanda Peet's charms tipping the scales while they were in my line of sight, and then the reality of the writing re-asserting itself the moment we cut away. Sorry, guys, that plotline didn't work for me at all.

What else.... spare from Matt and Harriett. Has there ever been another couple so toxic for one another? I'm one of those weird people who thinks if you don't respect the person you're with there are probably no wedding bells in your future. And while they may respect each other's talents, they don't respect each other in the least. I had no patience with it.

So what did I like? I really, really liked Jack Rudolph. I liked him on my first watch, and I adored him on my rewatch. While the nonsense storylines were happening, Steven Weber was acting his socks off and giving us a rounded character in Jack Rudolph and I could quite happily watch an entire show just about him. I could even stomach Jordan/Danny (if it had /Jack in the mix in there). I want to write fic about him - maybe something happens and the media is out for his blood and Danny and Matt for once try to watch out for him, because how about seeing him as a person you self-centred, sanctimonious - aherm, sorry. Or maybe the fact that Jack is constantly drunk, that he's a fighty yet considerate drunk, that he's sad he's getting divorced, that he's under pressure and he offers himself as the sacrificial lamb to protect the network - maybe we could have some time to flesh that out. I'd quite happily write a million words of gen fic (and/or shippy fic) for Jack is my point.

Tom and Simon! I love them. Mostly in connection with Jack, it has to be said, but also in relation to each other and to a lesser extent to Harriett (primarily because we don't see them with Harriett that much, weirdly). Tom's brother and that storyline was weirdly paced and endless, but I would have liked to see the fallout of that. What does Tom do after? How do Simon and Jack relate to each other after that?

I liked Cal, I liked the guest stars, I liked the premise. I guess I just didn't like the romance element which felt very forced and I would have preferred if we'd had 3/4 seasons before Danny/Jordan got together, and absolutely no will they/won't they on Matt/Harriett - just have them be exes! People do that!

Also, Jack. The show needed more Jack.

A couple more fics to round these off:

Lost Lilies Out of Mind - Gone with the Wind, Ella Lorena Kennedy for tabaqui

totus mundus agit histrionem (but at least there's an interval) - Good Omens, Aziraphale/Crowley for teigh_corvus

Part 1 of these is here.


Unrelated, the new Nancy Drew trailer is out, and I'm actually pretty excited about it! Yes, it's cheesy and very tongue in cheek, but it looks like fun.



The other thing I want to share is a rec for a Babylon 5 music video. It's incredibly spoilery (covering S2-4) so I've stuck it behind the cut:

( Read more... )

+ In case anyone outside the US / Canada has been trying to find the Star Trek Shorts, they've just been released on Netflix.

+ I've been listening to Peter Kenny's narration of the Culture books, and it is so good. I am incredibly fussy about audiobooks; I tend to either opt for non-fiction narratives or for full-on radio dramas. The two main exceptions to this are Peter Kenny reading the Culture books, and Michael Jayston reading the George Smiley novels. In both cases, the narration is impeccable - clear, crisp, and with excellent character voices. Both are highly recommended. I also managed to find pretty much the entire set of Culture novels at my local charity store, so I've re-bought them. Yes, I already have them in e-book format, but I pretty much hate e-book format for anything that isn't 1) fic, or 2) novellas or short stories.

+ Well, this preview of Black Widow #1 doesn't fill me with confidence. ( Read more... )

+ Paramount Was Hollywood’s ‘Mountain.’ Now It’s a Molehill. - this is so sad, and I had no idea other than a vague awareness that all the film studios would be under pressure from Netflix and other streaming competition. But the idea that Paramount might close due to the extreme short-sightedness of its managers - and that with it would go decades of cinema history - is such a sad one. (Also, this is the first I'm hearing of a Quentin Tarantino Star Trek, please someone tell me it's just an elaborate joke?)

+ I've finally found a source so I can watch Sun Records. Only watched the first ep so far, but I'm enjoying it. I'm guessing the heavy echoes of Mad Men were deliberately, right?

I like to pretend that I have high-brow tastes, but I was in a charity store recently and they had a copy of Anne Rice's The Witching Hour, and as I hadn't read any of the Mayfair witches books I decided that I was going to get it and read all 1206 pages. I'm on page 76 so far and addicted, because there's nothing quite like ludicrous purple prose to gladden my inner 13 year old's heart. 

Sometimes you just need junk food for the brain. NOM.

(I also bought A Place of Greater Safety which will likely languish on my bookshelf while I read Anne Rice instead.)

Day 15

Talk about why you participated in Snowflake &/or what you got out of it. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

I joined in because vae, sorchasilver and marginaliana recommended the challenge to me as a low-stress challenge that would ease me back into posting on a regular basis. And you know what? They were right! Thank you, ladies.

I had a great time writing on a (semi) regular basis for this challenge, and I met some lovely people. Everyone was incredibly kind and friendly. It was a wonderful way to ease myself back into DW and blogging in general.

Thank you especially to the challenge mods for a wonderful challenge and community. <3

Day 13

In your own space, set some goals for the coming year. They can be fannish or not, public or private. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

One goal overrides all the others - get a new job. My current role is not doing my mental health any favours, and I really do need to move on to something that is a better fit.

The rest of my goals are primarily around mental health: read more, write more, start writing in this journal again, that sort of thing. If I'm using the last 18 months as a comparator, I suppose an improvement isn't terribly difficult. But let's set that bar low, shall we?

So -

1) New job before the summer. That means I have to update my CV, a task which I failed to do over Christmas despite having 3 weeks off. But maybe I needed 3 weeks of nothing. Nevertheless, it's one of those tasks that has to be completed very soon.

2) Reading more means going back to the "50 books a year" target. That's a lot less than others manage, I appreciate that, however focusing my attention for any period of time is a skill I've lost. Multi-tasking? I'm there. Single focus? No. So this is a bit of a challenge, but let's see how I get on.

3) Write more. I signed up for chocoboxcomm and I'm trying to write more of my WIPs. I need to get back into the mentality of just writing, rather than requiring what I write to be satisfactory. Inevitably a certain proportion of words will be utter dross, and I need to get back to just getting stuff on the page because it's the process of writing that helps.

4) DW journal: probably not every day because that's beyond me, but anything would be an improvement.

That's probably enough for now.

I am sick. This has made all my various resolutions - to be creative, to post stuff, to read stuff, to be social - really complicated. i.e. I'm not doing anything. I also had a bunch of stuff I had to be physically present for at work, so the commute wasn't helping. I intend to spend the weekend in bed, hopefully with my laptop, definitely with paracetamol and tea. I will catch up on all the various comms / writing commitments / books then.

One thing I did manage to do was finish Ninefox Gambit by Yoon Ha Lee, and I am obsessed. It turns out that I have Raven Stratagem already somehow (possibly it was in the Hugo voters packet?) so I'll be devouring that & ordering book 3 as soon as my brain works. I've already read all the fic with the book 1 characters, so you can tell it was love at first sight. 

Day 7

Stretch yourself a little and try something new. Go play in a new fandom or with a new pairing. Try working in a new medium. Or check out some fanworks that are new to you. (The recs from Day 2 might be a good place to start.) Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

Yesterday, rather than filling in Day 7, I wrote something new - a rambling Riddler/Joker fic, based on The War of Jokes and Riddles. I'm not ready to post it yet because it's not finished and frankly it's not terribly good, but I'm not going to bin it, either. It's the journey, not the destination, right?

*

Day 8

In your own space, post self-recs for at least three fanworks that you created. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

After Day 7, day 8 was very easy. I don't really have favourite fics. I have some I don't like, some I'm downright ashamed of. I have others I'm proud of, or some that I remember working hard on and it's the memory of writing that I focus on. In no particular order, here are some fics I liked creating.

the ripple effect (4316 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Captain America (Movies)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Clint Barton/Laura Barton, Clint Barton & Tony Stark, Laura Barton & Tony Stark
Characters: Clint Barton, Laura Barton, Tony Stark
Additional Tags: Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Fix-It of Sorts, Reconciliation, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Clint sorts out his priorities
Summary: Middle of the night phonecalls rarely bring good news. This one is no different.

Why I liked writing it: my favourite fics are team-as-family fics. I love fics where the team gathers around and supports each other, and where their petty grievances are outweighed and superseded by more important matters. I knew what I wanted to see in a Clint fic, so I wrote it.

and thus the heart (8840 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Formula 1 RPF
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Alain Prost/Ayrton Senna
Characters: Alain Prost, Ayrton Senna
Additional Tags: Mildly Dubious Consent, First Time, Phone Sex, Prostate Milking, Voyeurism, Rough Sex, post-season 1993, pre-season 1994
Summary: Alain retires in 1993. A little after that, the phonecalls start.

Why I liked writing it: I'm going to write porn, I said to myself. I never do that, and I'm going to do it now. And then I'm going to grind them into powder.

up, up the long delirious burning blue (1226 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Top Gun (1986)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Relationships: Tom "Iceman" Kazansky/Pete "Maverick" Mitchell, Charlotte "Charlie" Blackwood/Pete "Maverick" Mitchell
Characters: Pete "Maverick" Mitchell
Additional Tags: Yuletide Treat, War Era
Summary: Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth / And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings ... Maverick is re-assigned to Bosnia. He's not prepared for it, not in the least.

Why I liked writing it: I don't know where this little fic came from, but I'm weirdly fond of it. I feel that writing it helped me set something right in my own head, although I can't remember why that would be. I think I wrote it in between jobs - having finished with one deployment, and starting another, and feeling that little bit closer to burn-out than I would have liked. I think a lot of that came through in writing this.

Sold Under Sin (3038 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Transmetropolitan
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Characters: Spider Jerusalem
Additional Tags: Yuletide, Yuletide 2008, Satire
Summary: How to get screwed with your pants on.

Why I liked writing it: I think Spider is my favourite character to write for. 

pirate superheroes (explode things and steal stuff) (1601 words) by kangeiko
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Nextwave (Comic)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Monica Rambeau, Aaron Stack, Tabitha Smith, Elsa Bloodstone, The Captain
Summary: How to put together an elite fighting team. With bonus lobsters.

Why I liked writing it *points to summary*

Stolen shamelessly from corvidology -


What are your most common ratings?